Please don't use social media to get back at me.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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