She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
