I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
