do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
