In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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