I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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