he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize