Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
