I wanna bring you to show and tell
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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