maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
This toilet bowl is my home.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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