I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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