We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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