What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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