i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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