My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
