It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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