I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
