why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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