So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize