Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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