Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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