i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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