OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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