im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
