your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
