He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize