If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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