if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
