I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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