some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
We have started to decorate penises.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
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