Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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