Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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