Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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