we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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