That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
