Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
