it wasn't lemon gatorade
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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