she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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