Define "chronic" masturbator.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
