it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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