He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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