Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
