the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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