NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize