So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
