We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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