I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
