Sponge bath it is.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I think my vagina is haunted
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize