what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
