I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
