Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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