I need to stop coming to work sober
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Are we still banned from the library?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Randomize